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I consider myself lucky that during my 5 years of blogging, 2 years YouTubing, and several other years Instagramming, I don't receive that much trolling and hate messages. Weird, isn't it? To consider yourself lucky to not receive that many nasty, personal comments whilst doing your job. Imagine going in to a regular office job and receiving the kind of awful messages that get thrown around at influencers? It'd never happen - HR would be having very stern words with Brenda from accounts for all those catty comments and post-its with obscenities written in a red sharpie that were left on your desk after you'd finished work last Friday.

This post is probably a stupid idea. Because I know haters on the internet thrive on attention. If you've ever sent hate my way you might be doing a happy dance that I'm acknowledging it, and of course there's a very good chance it might incite a little more my way. But, whatever, because more and more recently I've seen people discussing hate on the internet, their experiences being trolled, and I've seen women at the top of their A-game in the influencer world dealing with torrents of abuse. I have friends wanting to make a career step into YouTube, but are scared to do so because commenters are notoriously known for being so quick to critique and claw you. And the more I've seen myself grow, the more shit has come flinging my way.

The truth is though, it makes no fucking sense to me. What the fuck is the point? It makes my blood boil knowing someone is tapping away, spewing hateful bile into someones comments section that could well and truly ruin someones day. It's actually expected now - it's the norm to receive hate. But why? Why has it become so expected? So normalised? Yes, the internet has become a forum for open discussion, free speech, and all of the rest, but it's also become a cesspool of bullshit and bile too. It wouldn't be normal for someone to come up to you in the street and say it right to your face, so why has it become so common practice online?

Perhaps it's just super easy to mistake sharing oneself on the internet - like influencers do - as pure vanity, self-obsession and narcissism, making it easier to be horrible. If someone's already confident or arrogant enough to ceaselessly overshare their #ootd's then surely they could do with being knocked down a few pegs? Surely they're confident enough to take a few bullets of bad comments?

But more often than not it's far from the case. Influencers in general (and quite oddly) happen to be the most strangely self-conscious people that I know. When you're constantly sharing yourself on the internet, you're hyper aware of yourself and potential backlash. Plus, we're living in this social media bubble where everyone's lives are seemingly so perfect, it already feels hard enough. So receiving these additional comments just add so many more cracks to the veneer.



As I've said, I've been lucky enough to only have a few shitty comments, and I go through phases of being able to brush it off easily, and then on the polar opposite end of the scale, there's been days when I've received a hateful comment on YouTube that's made me feel so sad, self-conscious, worthless, and paranoid, that I cancelled all of the exciting plans I'd had for that day and I stayed in bed instead. It hurts. It cuts you and it makes you question yourself. I know not everybody is going to like you, but we're not used to having somebody come up to us and tell us face-to-face why they don't like us IRL, so having it written there in plain sight can definitely make uncomfortable reading.

What frustrates me so is how we're expected to ignore and rise above it, when all I want to do is clap back. "Don't add fuel to the fire! They want a reaction!" everyone always says. And of course, they are absolutely right. Skirting over the issue and ignoring the haters is the best way to deal with it, but it doesn't mean I don't want to have to stand up for myself and defend myself. And those times that we do stick up for ourselves, if we choose to, we're still expected to be super nice and sweet about it when the truth is half of the time we just want to say "fuck you!" The perfect example is the wonderful Em Sheldon, who responded to some douchey comment about her pose in an Instagram photo with such sweetness, it was as though she put a gun to the trolls head and shot out flowers and rainbows back at them instead of bullets. Lesson in decorum learnt - that girl has the patience and serenity of a nun!

The hilarious thing is most of the time we're just talking about clothes, or applying makeup, or sharing bits from our lives. It's not like we're doing 20 minute videos on why we support Donald Trump or something! How offensive can we really be? I literally want to tell you about my new dress, ok?



I love that I get to do this for a living, but I hate the hate that it opens me up to. I can't help think about the long and short-term mental effects it can have on people in this industry. We're told to brush it off - the whole "they're just jealous" thing - but the truth is I will never ever ever be able to understand the mentality behind people that choose to write nasty things about people, directly to them, on the internet. Most days I believe that I've landed my dream job, by blogging full-time, but then when the nastiness comes seeping in, it poisons and tarnishes the hard work and effort I put into what I do, and quite frankly, it's the only thing that makes me think "I can't do this" and want to quit.

This line of work is an emotional rollercoaster. The highs are the highest - last week the team at LIKEtoknow.it whisked me away to a 5* resort in the Austrian Alps where we were taken on helicopter rides, gifted Temperley London dresses, and there was a sauna in my suite. I could have cried for feeling so damn #blessed that I get these opportunities and it makes it seem like the long nights, early mornings shooting in subzero temperatures to *get the shot*, and nasty hateful comments are all worth it. But then, the lows are also the lowest - professionally - that I've felt. And when you read those horrible comments about yourself, of course it sticks, and you begin to question whether the perks are worth the emotional turmoil of it all.

But of course, that's kind of what they want, no? I did a little research into why haters hate so openly - and this confessional piece really shed some light on the situation. Trolls and haters do it because they're bored. Because they want attention. Or because they're unhappy with their own lives. And in fairness, we all know it, don't we? It's just sometimes a little hard to remember it when we're reading about how fat our ankles are etc (actual lol at that)

What really worries me, however, is the generations below us. I've written about how I was bullied when I was in school - but at least that could be escaped. When you came home from school everyday, you'd leave the bullies behind. But children these days are growing up with internet access where they can constantly be targeted. I'm in my twenties and these comments make me feel miserable - so how must an insecure 13 year old be affected? It's heartbreaking.

But there is lightness in all of the misery and darkness. As I see more and more people open up and talk about the hate they get online, and how awful it makes them feel, I'm seeing more and more obvious love on the internet. You just need to look at influencers comments on each others images to see the incredible girl-gang sense of support.

"KWAYNN!!!!"
"OMG U SO SEXY LOVE U"
"LITERALLY YOU ARE SUCH AN ANGEL I CANNOT COPE"
"WHO CREATED SUCH A PERFECT CREATURE?"
"YOU ARE TOO BEAUTIFUL I MIGHT DIE"

It's all so damn dramatic, but these absolute outbursts of appreciation on the internet for each other are so very, very appreciated against all of the hate. I just wish that the good comments left as much of a lasting impression as the bad ones.

On Haters and Trolls on The Internet






I consider myself lucky that during my 5 years of blogging, 2 years YouTubing, and several other years Instagramming, I don't receive that much trolling and hate messages. Weird, isn't it? To consider yourself lucky to not receive that many nasty, personal comments whilst doing your job. Imagine going in to a regular office job and receiving the kind of awful messages that get thrown around at influencers? It'd never happen - HR would be having very stern words with Brenda from accounts for all those catty comments and post-its with obscenities written in a red sharpie that were left on your desk after you'd finished work last Friday.

This post is probably a stupid idea. Because I know haters on the internet thrive on attention. If you've ever sent hate my way you might be doing a happy dance that I'm acknowledging it, and of course there's a very good chance it might incite a little more my way. But, whatever, because more and more recently I've seen people discussing hate on the internet, their experiences being trolled, and I've seen women at the top of their A-game in the influencer world dealing with torrents of abuse. I have friends wanting to make a career step into YouTube, but are scared to do so because commenters are notoriously known for being so quick to critique and claw you. And the more I've seen myself grow, the more shit has come flinging my way.

The truth is though, it makes no fucking sense to me. What the fuck is the point? It makes my blood boil knowing someone is tapping away, spewing hateful bile into someones comments section that could well and truly ruin someones day. It's actually expected now - it's the norm to receive hate. But why? Why has it become so expected? So normalised? Yes, the internet has become a forum for open discussion, free speech, and all of the rest, but it's also become a cesspool of bullshit and bile too. It wouldn't be normal for someone to come up to you in the street and say it right to your face, so why has it become so common practice online?

Perhaps it's just super easy to mistake sharing oneself on the internet - like influencers do - as pure vanity, self-obsession and narcissism, making it easier to be horrible. If someone's already confident or arrogant enough to ceaselessly overshare their #ootd's then surely they could do with being knocked down a few pegs? Surely they're confident enough to take a few bullets of bad comments?

But more often than not it's far from the case. Influencers in general (and quite oddly) happen to be the most strangely self-conscious people that I know. When you're constantly sharing yourself on the internet, you're hyper aware of yourself and potential backlash. Plus, we're living in this social media bubble where everyone's lives are seemingly so perfect, it already feels hard enough. So receiving these additional comments just add so many more cracks to the veneer.



As I've said, I've been lucky enough to only have a few shitty comments, and I go through phases of being able to brush it off easily, and then on the polar opposite end of the scale, there's been days when I've received a hateful comment on YouTube that's made me feel so sad, self-conscious, worthless, and paranoid, that I cancelled all of the exciting plans I'd had for that day and I stayed in bed instead. It hurts. It cuts you and it makes you question yourself. I know not everybody is going to like you, but we're not used to having somebody come up to us and tell us face-to-face why they don't like us IRL, so having it written there in plain sight can definitely make uncomfortable reading.

What frustrates me so is how we're expected to ignore and rise above it, when all I want to do is clap back. "Don't add fuel to the fire! They want a reaction!" everyone always says. And of course, they are absolutely right. Skirting over the issue and ignoring the haters is the best way to deal with it, but it doesn't mean I don't want to have to stand up for myself and defend myself. And those times that we do stick up for ourselves, if we choose to, we're still expected to be super nice and sweet about it when the truth is half of the time we just want to say "fuck you!" The perfect example is the wonderful Em Sheldon, who responded to some douchey comment about her pose in an Instagram photo with such sweetness, it was as though she put a gun to the trolls head and shot out flowers and rainbows back at them instead of bullets. Lesson in decorum learnt - that girl has the patience and serenity of a nun!

The hilarious thing is most of the time we're just talking about clothes, or applying makeup, or sharing bits from our lives. It's not like we're doing 20 minute videos on why we support Donald Trump or something! How offensive can we really be? I literally want to tell you about my new dress, ok?



I love that I get to do this for a living, but I hate the hate that it opens me up to. I can't help think about the long and short-term mental effects it can have on people in this industry. We're told to brush it off - the whole "they're just jealous" thing - but the truth is I will never ever ever be able to understand the mentality behind people that choose to write nasty things about people, directly to them, on the internet. Most days I believe that I've landed my dream job, by blogging full-time, but then when the nastiness comes seeping in, it poisons and tarnishes the hard work and effort I put into what I do, and quite frankly, it's the only thing that makes me think "I can't do this" and want to quit.

This line of work is an emotional rollercoaster. The highs are the highest - last week the team at LIKEtoknow.it whisked me away to a 5* resort in the Austrian Alps where we were taken on helicopter rides, gifted Temperley London dresses, and there was a sauna in my suite. I could have cried for feeling so damn #blessed that I get these opportunities and it makes it seem like the long nights, early mornings shooting in subzero temperatures to *get the shot*, and nasty hateful comments are all worth it. But then, the lows are also the lowest - professionally - that I've felt. And when you read those horrible comments about yourself, of course it sticks, and you begin to question whether the perks are worth the emotional turmoil of it all.

But of course, that's kind of what they want, no? I did a little research into why haters hate so openly - and this confessional piece really shed some light on the situation. Trolls and haters do it because they're bored. Because they want attention. Or because they're unhappy with their own lives. And in fairness, we all know it, don't we? It's just sometimes a little hard to remember it when we're reading about how fat our ankles are etc (actual lol at that)

What really worries me, however, is the generations below us. I've written about how I was bullied when I was in school - but at least that could be escaped. When you came home from school everyday, you'd leave the bullies behind. But children these days are growing up with internet access where they can constantly be targeted. I'm in my twenties and these comments make me feel miserable - so how must an insecure 13 year old be affected? It's heartbreaking.

But there is lightness in all of the misery and darkness. As I see more and more people open up and talk about the hate they get online, and how awful it makes them feel, I'm seeing more and more obvious love on the internet. You just need to look at influencers comments on each others images to see the incredible girl-gang sense of support.

"KWAYNN!!!!"
"OMG U SO SEXY LOVE U"
"LITERALLY YOU ARE SUCH AN ANGEL I CANNOT COPE"
"WHO CREATED SUCH A PERFECT CREATURE?"
"YOU ARE TOO BEAUTIFUL I MIGHT DIE"

It's all so damn dramatic, but these absolute outbursts of appreciation on the internet for each other are so very, very appreciated against all of the hate. I just wish that the good comments left as much of a lasting impression as the bad ones.





Party season is in full swing IRL and on Fashion Slave - because here I am, at it again, in the sparkly outfits and on the cocktails. And in the sparkliest, prettiest most Instagrammable bar a millennial female could wish for - Tonight Josephine. You only need to search the geotag on the gram to find the most #GirlPower posts of female rebellion and sass. But this time I'm not just talking party dressing - it's all about accessories - and ones that'll last way past when you inevitably break your New Year's diet (It's ok I won't tell). I've also got a little edit of the accessories that make the perfect gifts for those tricky-to-buy-for types.



The Clutch 
The importance of the perfect party bag is one that's seriously undervalued. It's often an afterthought - once you've already thrown on your going out-out outfit. So it makes all sartorial sense that you should buy one that goes with absolutely everything flawlessly, like Radley's boxy Bedford Road clutch.  Small enough to look chic, but large enough to pack your iPhone and lipsticks in, it's the perfect finishing touch to an outfit. It also has a chain strap for those times you need to use both of your hands to bust out the best dance moves - or to hold two glasses of champagne at once.

Perfect gift for: YOURSELF! Or your best mate so she stops asking to borrow a bag from your selection every time you go for drinks!



Perfect Gifts 


If you're looking for something small but perfectly formed, the pom pom keyring is just that. It's spot-on for personalising bags and making it just that little bit special.

Perfect gift for: your sister - it's quite cute, young and playful.




Then you've got the watch. Everybody needs to tell the time! This isn't no medieval look at the position of the sun in the sky vibe. I picked this diamante-embellished one in a subtle nude colourway as it still has a bit of festive sparkle, but the gentle hues are perfect for the upcoming spring season too. 

Perfect gift for: your mother, who's always always punctual so time-telling is clearly of great importance. Or, your best mate who's always always late for everything (cough cough, Gemma Talbot) 


Ah, the classic wallet. Purses and wallets always make quite thoughtful and elegant gifts to give, and Radley's Arlington Street purse is super simple and minimalist enough that it's enough to put a genuine smile on even the most difficult people to buy for. Honestly, I can't think of anyone that wouldn't benefit from a super chic purse. Even myself - I had intended on gifting this pretty to my mother but, well, I don't even have my own purse. 

Perfect gift for: those picky people to buy for, and those who you might not know too well like your boyfriend's mother or sister. 



This post was created in collaboration with Radley


Sassy Party Accessories And Stylish Gifts





Party season is in full swing IRL and on Fashion Slave - because here I am, at it again, in the sparkly outfits and on the cocktails. And in the sparkliest, prettiest most Instagrammable bar a millennial female could wish for - Tonight Josephine. You only need to search the geotag on the gram to find the most #GirlPower posts of female rebellion and sass. But this time I'm not just talking party dressing - it's all about accessories - and ones that'll last way past when you inevitably break your New Year's diet (It's ok I won't tell). I've also got a little edit of the accessories that make the perfect gifts for those tricky-to-buy-for types.



The Clutch 
The importance of the perfect party bag is one that's seriously undervalued. It's often an afterthought - once you've already thrown on your going out-out outfit. So it makes all sartorial sense that you should buy one that goes with absolutely everything flawlessly, like Radley's boxy Bedford Road clutch.  Small enough to look chic, but large enough to pack your iPhone and lipsticks in, it's the perfect finishing touch to an outfit. It also has a chain strap for those times you need to use both of your hands to bust out the best dance moves - or to hold two glasses of champagne at once.

Perfect gift for: YOURSELF! Or your best mate so she stops asking to borrow a bag from your selection every time you go for drinks!



Perfect Gifts 


If you're looking for something small but perfectly formed, the pom pom keyring is just that. It's spot-on for personalising bags and making it just that little bit special.

Perfect gift for: your sister - it's quite cute, young and playful.




Then you've got the watch. Everybody needs to tell the time! This isn't no medieval look at the position of the sun in the sky vibe. I picked this diamante-embellished one in a subtle nude colourway as it still has a bit of festive sparkle, but the gentle hues are perfect for the upcoming spring season too. 

Perfect gift for: your mother, who's always always punctual so time-telling is clearly of great importance. Or, your best mate who's always always late for everything (cough cough, Gemma Talbot) 


Ah, the classic wallet. Purses and wallets always make quite thoughtful and elegant gifts to give, and Radley's Arlington Street purse is super simple and minimalist enough that it's enough to put a genuine smile on even the most difficult people to buy for. Honestly, I can't think of anyone that wouldn't benefit from a super chic purse. Even myself - I had intended on gifting this pretty to my mother but, well, I don't even have my own purse. 

Perfect gift for: those picky people to buy for, and those who you might not know too well like your boyfriend's mother or sister. 



This post was created in collaboration with Radley










“Girls Night Out” – it may sound oh-so-simple, but all of us know it's not. It’s a total ritual. It’s a bonding session. You’ve got the group Whatsapping before it all starts:

“what are you wearing out?”

“who’s house are we going to drink at first?”

“can I borrow your glittery dress with the cut-out back please?!”

“does anyone have eyelash glue I can use???”

Then there’s the actual getting ready – hair curling, makeup application left, right and centre, all usually done to the sassiest playlist you have on Spotify (Can I please recommend this one?)



Then there are the drinks. A few pre-party cocktails to warm you up before the big night really begins – best served with an extra large side order of gossip, selfies, and Instagram stories you may or may not regret posting the next day.

Actually, sometimes you can forget the actual night out – as girls, we all know that sometimes the best part of a night out is actually the bit where we’re all have fun, drinking together and getting ready at one of the girls houses, rather than wandering around a club, unable to speak over the music, losing each other, dropping your MAC lipstick down the loo, and then having an awkward encounter with your ex whilst alone because you’re friends are in the smoking area.





Yes, I absolutely live for a girls night out. I’m sure you’ve all seen how Gemma has become my partner in crime for all situations as of late for some d-floor action (and the recovery brunch we go for the morning after – always) So I’ll always jump at any excuse to have a few drinks and a dance with this girl. Oh, and did I mention one of the many things we bond over was our love of coffee? So when RumChata offered for us to try their coffee-based Lattini cocktail, it was an easy win-win for both of us.

To help Gemma and I prepare for the perfect Girls Night Out, RumChata treated us to bursting box of goodies, including a very Instagram-able gold cocktail shakers, glittery confetti, party snacks, cocktail ingredients and of course, the classic rum-based cream liqueur itself – which is a delicious blend of Caribbean rum, fresh cream, cinnamon, vanilla and secret spices.

Now, I’m not sure about you, but I absolutely love cocktails. They’re my go-to drink and I basically live for happy hour. But I do worry that when winter hits, I start to lose my fun streak and favour staying in over going out. So my winter resolution was to be far more ‘carpe diem’, seize the day (well, night) and go out and make some memories. And girls nights out are perfect occasions for it!








To create our delicious Lattini cocktail, we had to shake equal parts of the vanilla vodka, coffee liqueur, and espresso over ice, pour into a martini glass, then finish by adding a shot of RumChata to give that delicious creamy finish and marble effect.











It’s like an espresso martini but lusciously creamy. Yes, the winter nights are long, but this drink is enough to give you the right amount of pep and perk for when the DJ starts playing those 90s RnB classics.

If that’s not your vibe (not music-wise, we all love a bit of 90S RnB, right?) then there are tonnes of other delicious recipes on their website. I’m desperate to try out the Banana Coffee Cake Martini (seriously this sounds like heaven!) the Key Lime Pie Martini (do I just have a thing for alcoholic cakes in martini form?) or an Iced Caramel Mocha. There are different drinks for all year round too – so you’ll find some super fruit summery ones to bookmark when the sun starts to shine again!


What's your favourite cocktail?

If you're still more of a girls night in kinda gal, then check out Gemma's post on how to have the ultimate Girl's Night In instead!



This post was kindly sponsored by RumChata. Please remember to drink responsibly.


The Ultimate Girls Night Out With RumChata









“Girls Night Out” – it may sound oh-so-simple, but all of us know it's not. It’s a total ritual. It’s a bonding session. You’ve got the group Whatsapping before it all starts:

“what are you wearing out?”

“who’s house are we going to drink at first?”

“can I borrow your glittery dress with the cut-out back please?!”

“does anyone have eyelash glue I can use???”

Then there’s the actual getting ready – hair curling, makeup application left, right and centre, all usually done to the sassiest playlist you have on Spotify (Can I please recommend this one?)



Then there are the drinks. A few pre-party cocktails to warm you up before the big night really begins – best served with an extra large side order of gossip, selfies, and Instagram stories you may or may not regret posting the next day.

Actually, sometimes you can forget the actual night out – as girls, we all know that sometimes the best part of a night out is actually the bit where we’re all have fun, drinking together and getting ready at one of the girls houses, rather than wandering around a club, unable to speak over the music, losing each other, dropping your MAC lipstick down the loo, and then having an awkward encounter with your ex whilst alone because you’re friends are in the smoking area.





Yes, I absolutely live for a girls night out. I’m sure you’ve all seen how Gemma has become my partner in crime for all situations as of late for some d-floor action (and the recovery brunch we go for the morning after – always) So I’ll always jump at any excuse to have a few drinks and a dance with this girl. Oh, and did I mention one of the many things we bond over was our love of coffee? So when RumChata offered for us to try their coffee-based Lattini cocktail, it was an easy win-win for both of us.

To help Gemma and I prepare for the perfect Girls Night Out, RumChata treated us to bursting box of goodies, including a very Instagram-able gold cocktail shakers, glittery confetti, party snacks, cocktail ingredients and of course, the classic rum-based cream liqueur itself – which is a delicious blend of Caribbean rum, fresh cream, cinnamon, vanilla and secret spices.

Now, I’m not sure about you, but I absolutely love cocktails. They’re my go-to drink and I basically live for happy hour. But I do worry that when winter hits, I start to lose my fun streak and favour staying in over going out. So my winter resolution was to be far more ‘carpe diem’, seize the day (well, night) and go out and make some memories. And girls nights out are perfect occasions for it!








To create our delicious Lattini cocktail, we had to shake equal parts of the vanilla vodka, coffee liqueur, and espresso over ice, pour into a martini glass, then finish by adding a shot of RumChata to give that delicious creamy finish and marble effect.











It’s like an espresso martini but lusciously creamy. Yes, the winter nights are long, but this drink is enough to give you the right amount of pep and perk for when the DJ starts playing those 90s RnB classics.

If that’s not your vibe (not music-wise, we all love a bit of 90S RnB, right?) then there are tonnes of other delicious recipes on their website. I’m desperate to try out the Banana Coffee Cake Martini (seriously this sounds like heaven!) the Key Lime Pie Martini (do I just have a thing for alcoholic cakes in martini form?) or an Iced Caramel Mocha. There are different drinks for all year round too – so you’ll find some super fruit summery ones to bookmark when the sun starts to shine again!


What's your favourite cocktail?

If you're still more of a girls night in kinda gal, then check out Gemma's post on how to have the ultimate Girl's Night In instead!



This post was kindly sponsored by RumChata. Please remember to drink responsibly.


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